My uncle died when I was just a baby. It is disappointing because I was just a baby. He died when I was just four years old. I wish I could see him once more. If I could see him one more time I would say " I love you". Even though he has died, I still love him. I have only seen him in pictures. My uncle had three cats Champ, Roosevelt, and Charlie. Charlie is still alive and he lives with my nana. My uncle’s name was Jack and he liked to bake chocolate cake, and he loved painting cats.
Monday, October 25, 2010
A Person Who Matters to Me by Sophie
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Hey Sophie!
ReplyDeleteI really liked your story about your uncle and i understand how you feel because my uncle died when i was younger too. The sentence “But i still love him” is great because it shows your feelings and makes the piece personal, but maybe you should combine it with the sentence “He died when I just four years old”. Also this sentence should have a was in front of just. I really enjoyed the details you put in about your uncle like all his hobbies and pets, but maybe this should be said in the beginning of the piece. When you say “I wish you could see him once more”, what would you say to your uncle if you could see him again? Anyway, i loved your story and i can’t wait to discuss it more with you!
-Lindsey