Monday, December 6, 2010
Sleep Over
My friend Natalie invited me to a sleep over at her mom's house. We ate speedy, then I met her pug. That didn't go so well. We played dress up then it started to rain very hard. We heard thunder. It was very scary. We couldn't go outside any more. We played dress up again and I asked if we could have a fashion show. Natalie said yes so I picked a dress. Natalie yelled "That's my dress." We yelled at each other and I yelled "But I found it!" Natalie said "O.K.!" We got ready and got her mom and dad to watch us. I tripped over my dress "Ouch!" I yelled. "What?" yelled Natalie. "I didn't know that the dress was too long." I said.
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Hey Sophie,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your story. I used to do fashion shows all the time. It was my greatest downtime. Haha.
You seem to have forgotten to describe what the dress looked like. I'm curious!
I really like your use of dialogue. You did it well.
Maybe you could talk about what happened after you tripped. Overall, what did you think of the sleepover?
Hope to see you again soon,
Cassie